Meter
The question I get most often is, why did I make the characters in Hamlet talk all funny? You have to remember, 25 years ago when I wrote this play, everybody talked in iambic pentameter. If you went to Starbucks and ordered your latte in — for example — trochaic hexameter? You were basically asking to have coffee thrown in your face. Or if you went to the hospital and asked for a vasectomy in – oh, I don’t know – dactylic monometer? They’d probably treat you for a headache. If you don’t believe me, just talk to my children. All twelve of them. All effing twelve of them.
My kids still don't believe that when I was little, the whole world was black and white. I even have pictures to prove it. The world changes. Language changes. The laws of physics change.